Dear Mom: How ON EARHT do you do it?

Mothers are perhaps the most  creatures that are taken for granted in the world. Why wouldn’t they be? We might understand some of the sacrifices they make and a part of the hardships they endure starting from childbirth to staying up all night tending to sick children to changing diapers and so on. But the fact of the matter is, we don’t even know the half of it, and it’s for one simple reason: we’re not there.

Take my mother and I as a case in point, and let me give you a brief introduction of the pain and misery I’ve caused her before I was even born. You see, my mother spent a whole week having contractions before she delivered me to the world. You might think it isn’t possible but apparently it happens, she spent a whole week in pain before I finally came out, not only that, I was also taking an upside-down position inside the womb and yet she didn’t have a c-section, it was a very hard natural birth. Add jaundice to the equation and three days I spent in the hospital while my mother was sent home and wasn’t allowed to see me and you might get the picture. Why would they prevent a mother from seeing her baby that has something as common as jaundice? Well, that was over 25 years ago, I think some changes have been made.


I’m not going to count the ways I’ve made my mother sad, angry, worried, etc. obviously that could take pages. So, let me cut to the chase and get to what inspired me to write this post.

About 2 weeks ago my mother left to Abu Dhabi because my sister is expecting and she needs mom to be there for the childbirth. With mom gone, someone needs to take care of the house. You know, cleaning, washing, watering the plants, etc.

Of course it’s not a secret that I’m not a fan of domestic chores and, well, not the best one to do them. And since my father and brothers are quite cooperative I don’t have to do much around the house. It’s hardly anything more than washing a few dishes, scrubbing the toilet and occasionally tossing some clothes in the washing machine. Once a week however, on Friday, I would do a little bit more than that. I would vacuum clean the house, do some dusting, clean the bathroom like a hopeless scrupulous and might even do something as extreme in my standards as mopping the floor, like I did today for the first time. Yes, the neat freak in me suddenly woke up and declared rebellion…

What I’m trying to say here is, once a week I do less than half the work my mother does almost everyday, or at least several times a week! And it makes me feel tired, and it makes me feel like I’m not having as much time as I like for other things, and it annoys me when someone smears the floor with footprints after I have just cleaned it, and I would remember my mother when she gets so annoyed about the same thing, just now I really understand!

And I ask myself, how does she do it? Not to mention that she had the added bonus of raising 4 children, driving them to and from school sometimes, helping them in their study, cooking for a family of 6, even repairing malfunctioning electric plugs. Heck, my mother once painted the house herself! She’s multi-tasking like that…

And yet, she doesn’t complain or even ask any of us to help her. See, that’s the thing, mothers are underappreciated no matter how much you try to appreciate them, they are still underappreciated.  Yet, most moms don’t seem to mind it. What on earth is motherhood? What is that instinct that makes a mom endure all she endures and expect nothing in return? Can logic ever give an answer to this?

Maybe it’s the trade’s secret, something only mothers are meant to know…


6 responses

  1. 🙂 enjoyed reading this to the max.
    We do take them for granted, don`t we! 😦

    I remember once reading a report some 5 years ago saying that a stay-in-home- mom`s work = 2 full-time jobs! Now I think it = 3.

    U know what 3ola, I think u should have this post printed out and circulate it around the house, seriously! 🙂 😉

    *Mabrok 4 yr sis.


  2. Ola, my mother’s heart went pitter-patter. 🙂 Yes, there are some trade secrets to motherhood, you know them as a right of passage. When you wash dishes, you thank God for His provision for your babies. When your hubby snores, you thank God for a man who loves Him and you. When you see those muddy footprints, you thank God for healthy kids (or that you even have them!)

    I do make my kids do chores, it helps prepare them to understand those secrets too.

    Hope your mom sees your sweet words. Another reason why we do what we do. 🙂

  3. I loved reading this!
    Now that my mom is visiting me helping me out with my 1st kid and getting me ready for the second I still wonder how she could do it!
    like right now, she took my dughter swimming so I could have some me time :$ She does it with so much love…So the kind of love and the amount of giving mothers have extends along with the family 🙂 It’s amazing!

    May Allah SWT bless your mom!

  4. Amen, sista! Kinzi, you went and blew it with your lovely sentiments that waft through my heart occasionally but not as often as they should.

    Ola, I am sure your mother will come back soon and you can show her your new appreciation for her. I’ll bet you are a swell daughter, too.

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